Before We Come Undone



We have come a long way, yet we still have so far to go.

Recently, I witness some truly despicable comments under a photo of Austin Wolf posing with a feminine black male Misael Diaz, and it ignited some feelings in me that I feel more often than I would like to admit… Disappointment.

While I’m not feminine, I was lucky enough to have an experience with Austin a few years back and one of the most alluring qualities about him beyond his chiseled frame is his open heart and how he truly sees everyone. We have witnessed that from the array of guys featured in his videos and I witnessed it during our singular encounter, but the comments got me thinking that we may ultimately be responsible for our own undoing especially if we are unwilling to escape the prejudices disguised and labeled as preferences that continue to tear at the soul of our being.

Far too often we witness marginalized groups such as the gay community continue to spew the very hate that we protest and argue against, and if we can’t have respect and human decency for each other, then how can we expect it from those that still don’t understand the plight of our journey or agree with life choices.

My own personal turmoil and struggle with accepting who I am has not been an easy road to travel, and even to this day I haven’t been able to vocalize my full being to my family, because I know they will not be accepting. Instead, it becomes the elephant in the room that we just pretend isn’t there. So, the added weight of potentially facing the same scrutiny from the people running the same race almost makes it unbearable.

To think that we are in 2020, and still seeing guys openly list “no blacks”, “no whites” or “no asians” on their profiles as if that is no big deal tells me that there is still work to do.

We have to learn to find a place of solace in each other, because when the battle gets tough, we are all that we have and the fight starts with us. If we want society to start viewing the gay community as equals, then we have to view ourselves as such or we will forever be digging a grave for our own demise.

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